Personal grooming can divide opinions. And inside a relationship, this is no different. In today’s story, we have a man who went online to see if his ultimatum to his girlfriend was too extreme.
He told on the internet his side of the story.
For context, I (25M) and my girlfriend (23F) have been together for a year, almost 2. When we first got together it was great, I had literally no complaints about her, and something I even told her early on in the relationship during a conversation about our likes and dislikes that I don’t find body hair on women attractive.
What I mean by body hair, I’m only talking about the armpits and legs. Everything else I don’t care. I told her I don’t mind stubble or just a little bit of growth but full-blown long leg and armpit hair I don’t find attractive at all. She didn’t mind that I had that preference because she told me she didn’t like the sensation of body hair on her.
Well, recently she started growing out her body hair. Her armpits and legs almost look like mine now. I’ve asked her multiple times about it, not to remove it straight up but why has she been growing it out, she said she saw a TikTok about body positivity, and it made her feel more confident.
I tried to like it, but I can’t. It doesn’t look good. I finally told her straight up that I didn’t find it attractive. She didn’t like that, and said she didn’t want me to be like «one of those men.» I told her if she doesn’t shave, I’m going to break up since I don’t find her attractive because of this. Let’s just say she got extremely pissed off, that I’m never gonna find a woman that shaves daily for me. Am I wrong?
He then found the need to add more information.
I thought I’d add some more info. I never said shave daily. I even said in the post I don’t care about some body hair. She had her leg and armpit hair grown out for months, all the while I’m asking her about it. It’s extremely long and not taken care of, and I cannot be forced to like it.
I did not straight up tell her I was going to break up with her, this was after multiple attempts of me trying to ask her about it and saying I was not attracted to it.
And people gave him their honest opinions.
«You two are growing up and maturing, so you both will change. Time to move on. You’ll find someone who shaves, and she’ll find someone who accepts her for who she is.» lynnlugg7777 / Reddit«I mean, you’re allowed to break up with her, but it’s gonna be an interesting life if you plan to only date women who are constantly shaving. It’s just not possible. This level of superficiality is gonna bite you down the road.» mandarinandbasil / Reddit«You’re allowed to not like it, but she’s also allowed to do what she wants with her body.» MercifulOtter / Reddit
«I would tell you to break up with her so she can find someone who loves her for her and not something superficial like the amount of body hair she has.» P***id-Astronomer797 / Reddit«If your relationship can’t weather a little body hair, what hope does it have for when a real issue arises? This is probably best for you both if that’s how little you’re willing to adapt for each other.» rustys_shackled_ford / Reddit«I just want to add to everyone else and say that if you really love someone, a bit of ‘unattractive’ hair isn’t gonna change your feelings about that person. So if you find her THAT unattractive with a bit of hair, she’s definitely not the one for you. Find someone you can find attractive with body hair because everyone has them.» Dizzy-Ad-4526 / Reddit
He then made a decision.
I looked through the majority of comments, I understand that I was wrong. I decided to break it off with her. She did not take it lightly and decided to insult me. She ended up leaving, though after some time, to stay at her mom’s house.
I didn’t realize at the time it was wrong of me to give her an ultimatum about this, so I deserved the insults. Thanks for the judgments though, changed my view on this sort of topic, but I thought it would be a good thing for the both of us to move on from each other.
The story of navigating shaving preferences within a relationship serves as a reminder of the importance of communication, empathy, and respect. While individual preferences and expectations may vary, it is important to approach such discussions with sensitivity and understanding. Ultimatums, as demonstrated in this narrative, can introduce tension and strain, risking the very foundation upon which love and trust are built. Instead, open dialogue, mutual compromise, and a willingness to embrace differences can pave the way for greater intimacy and connection.
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