In-laws are like lottery tickets — you never know whether you’ll get good or bad ones. The luck wasn’t on our reader’s side because her in-laws still remember her husband’s ex-wife. At some point, our reader was so sick of constant comparison that she decided to pour soup over her MIL’s head.
Our reader shared her story with us.
Thanks for reaching out to us! We understand your frustration, and we came up with some ideas that can help you deal with the situation.
Apologize to her anyway.
It might have been a great moment for you, but it was an unpleasant one for your husband and your in-laws. If you want to have a good relationship with your husband again, consider apologizing to his mother. Perhaps that will be your moment to talk it out and explain how much it hurts you when they compare you to your husband’s ex-wife.
Stop trying.
Your in-laws are grown up people, and it’s clear they don’t even want to meet you halfway. Your life and your decisions shouldn’t revolve around their mood and wishes. If they don’t want to find a compromise, no matter what you do, stop trying. It will not lead anywhere and will only negatively affect your well-being. If your husband ignores them, maybe you should too.
Spend less time with them.
Tell your husband that you don’t feel comfortable around your in-laws. He probably knows why, so it won’t come as a surprise to him. If it’s a celebration, suggest that you can celebrate in another place, not at home with your in-laws.
Take him to your parents, for example. If they visit you regularly, make sure you leave and don’t cross paths with them. If they refuse to compromise, you’ll have to decide if you want to have them around or avoid them on certain occasions instead.
Accept them as they are.
People are different, and so are their opinions. You can’t control what your in-laws think about you, and you can’t force them to think differently unless they change their minds on their own. It’s not uncommon for people to have difficult relationships with their in-laws.
So if your marriage means a lot to you, consider your in-laws as a small side effect. You’re married to your husband, not to your in-laws, and ultimately, it’s about the relationship between the two of you.
Not only in-laws can cause drama in our lives, our siblings can complicate things as well. In this article, our reader refused to let her sister walk down the aisle during her wedding. What’s even worse is that her sister is terminally ill and has never been in a relationship before.
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