Here are the common signs your kids are being bullied

Learn about the signs indicating your child might be a target of bullying and find effective ways to help them.

Bullying among children is a big problem these days.

Bullying happens when someone repeatedly hurts or picks on another person on purpose. It can be hitting, teasing, or even saying mean things online.

This is a serious issue because it not only makes children feel bad right away but can also cause lasting problems.

Affinity Health, a company that helps with good health coverage, says bullying is a big problem as it can really affect how children and teens feel inside, messing with their emotions and minds.

“Bullying is a widespread concern that affects millions of children worldwide.
“Recognising common signs that a child may be experiencing bullying is essential for early intervention and ensuring their emotional well-being,” says Murray Hewlett, CEO of Affinity Health.

Young boy being cyber bullied. Picture: iStock

What is bullying?

Bullying among children happens when one child repeatedly and on purpose does mean or aggressive things that hurt, scare, or make another child upset.

This can take place in different places like school, after-school activities, and sports.

Different types of bullying

Children can experience bullying in different ways:

• Physical bullying: involves actions like hitting, kicking, or pushing.
• Verbal bullying: encompasses name-calling, taunting, or using hurtful words.
• Social bullying: involves exclusion, spreading rumours, or manipulating friendships.
• Cyberbullying: involves using technology to harass, threaten, humiliate, or intimidate others.
• Psychological bullying: involves intimidation, manipulation, and control.

Signs your child may be the victim of bullying

Identifying signs that a child is facing bullying is essential for taking prompt action and offering the necessary support. Certain indicators that could suggest your child is being bullied are:

Emotional Changes: A child being bullied may exhibit increased irritability, anxiety, or depression. They may become withdrawn, show a loss of interest in activities they once enjoyed, or display signs of sadness without an apparent cause.

Changes in Eating and Sleeping Habits: A child who is bullied may suddenly lose their appetite, skip meals, or overeat to cope with their feelings of stress and anxiety. Bullying-related stress can also disrupt a child’s sleep patterns, leading to insomnia, nightmares, or a sudden increase in night waking.

Physical Complaints: A bullied child may experience unexplained physical complaints, such as headaches, stomach aches, or other somatic symptoms. They may also have unexplained injuries, such as bruises, cuts, or scrapes.

Withdrawal from Social Activities: A child who is being bullied may withdraw from social activities, including school clubs, sports, and gatherings with friends. They may become isolated and reluctant to engage with peers.

Decline in Academic Performance: Bullying can affect a child’s ability to concentrate and perform well in school. A noticeable decline in academic performance may be an indicator of bullying-related stress.

Loss of Personal Items: Bullying sometimes involves theft or damage to personal belongings. If a child frequently loses items or comes home with damaged possessions, it may be a sign of bullying.

Changes in Social Media Behaviour: Watch for changes in a child’s social media behaviour, including harassment or exclusion.

Avoiding Certain Routes or Areas: Children who are bullied may try to avoid specific routes or areas where they have encountered their tormentors, such as streets, bus stops, or corners of the school.

Frequent Requests for Money or Belongings: Bullies may extort money or personal belongings from their victims. If a child frequently asks for money or items without a clear explanation, it could be a sign of bullying.

Loss of Confidence and Self-Esteem: A child’s self-esteem and self-confidence may suffer due to bullying. They might start doubting themselves or expressing feelings of worthlessness.

A mother comforting her child who is a victim of bullying. Picture: iStock

What to do if your child is being bullied

The first step in addressing bullying is establishing open communication with your child. Create a safe and non-judgmental space for them to share their experiences and feelings. Let them know that you are there to listen and support them.

Keep a detailed record of each bullying episode, noting dates, locations, individuals involved, and any evidence you can gather, such as screenshots or photos. This documentation may be helpful when discussing the issue with school authorities.

If bullying occurs, contact school staff, including teachers, counsellors, or the principal. Share the documented information and request a meeting to discuss the situation. Collaborate with the school to develop strategies to stop bullying and create a safe environment for your child.

Empower your child with coping strategies to handle bullying situations. You should encourage them to avoid confrontations, use assertive communication, and seek help from trusted adults when needed. Teach them the importance of staying composed and assertive when responding to bullies.

If your child is experiencing severe emotional distress or displays signs of anxiety or depression due to bullying, consider involving a therapist, counsellor, or online support group like SADAG or Childline South Africa. These professionals can provide the necessary support and strategies to help your child cope with the emotional impact of bullying.

In extreme cases where bullying involves threats or poses a real danger to your child’s safety, don’t hesitate to involve law enforcement.

Lastly, stay involved in your child’s life and support them while closely monitoring the situation to ensure the bullying stops and doesn’t resurface.

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