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Let no peach go unstoned

January 1, 2024
in News
Let no peach go unstoned
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This really is the pits for Ted Jarrett of Berry: “Why is it so difficult to find freestone peaches? Plenty of clingstones are available, but the variety is not disclosed.” Patience, Ted. Our friend Stephanie Edwards once told C8 that “early season peaches were all clingstones, and freestones did not come until much later.”

The eternal presence of the hot cross bun (C8) is confirmed by the following observation from Paul Keir of Strathfield: “Here’s a new twist. On Saturday, I saw hot cross buns that have been on display for so long they are nearing their expiry date, 50 per cent off. Coles, Concord.”

“Speaking of hot cross buns, do kids still sing ‘Hot cross buns! Hot cross buns! One a penny, two a penny’ at school?” asks Jack Dikian of Mosman. “I suppose $1.30 per bun doesn’t quite roll of the tongue.”

A request from Tim Glover of Rozelle: “Could we please start the New Year using ‘The proof of the pudding is in the eating’ rather than ‘The proof is in the pudding’ which it clearly isn’t? There, I feel better now.”

For those with wholesome resolutions, Nedra Orme of Neutral Bay notes that “Non-alcoholic wine is now available with a ‘NON ALC’ label on the front in clear print, with ‘less than 0.5 per cent ALC/VOL’ on the back label. Take your pick.”

“Talking about word processors (C8), have you tried writing something into a translator app, language of your choice, then translate that back into English?” writes Alison Brooks of Hope Island (Qld). I usually become Alison Little Streams.”

Addressing the sarcasm vs pun debate (C8), Reg Richardson of Mosman says he stands to be corrected “but I think that the number 20 in a light globe is the lowest form of watt.” Bev Bayer of Kingston (ACT) thinks the statement that “the bun is the lowest form of wheat may go along with the remark about multigrain bread being half-wheated.”

The corny stuff continues with cricket tragic, Glyn Bradford of Hawker (ACT): “During the Boxing Day Test, the Shane Warne Stand was shown many times. Every time I saw it, most people were sitting.”

Tony Hunt of Gordon reckons the commentary during the match would be “Incomprehensible to an ESL listener” as evidenced by the following: “He managed one right out of the screws and then was done all ends up by the next”.

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