Key PointsKat Clark was named TikTok Creator of the Year in 2022 and has almost six million followers on the platform.Almost two decades ago, Clark was a teen mum who says she suffered from domestic abuse.More than being a well-known influencer, Clark says she values her role as mum to two daughters the most.
* SBS Filipino’s Buhay Influencer is a series focused on the nuances of undertaking an influencer path, as well as the challenges and rewards of having a public persona.
“My mum and I have a great relationship now, but it was challenging as I was growing up,” said 2022 TikTok Creator of the Year, Kat Clark.
Before developing a better relationship with her mum and finding success on the social media platform, Clark said she found herself pregnant at 16 and in the midst of an abusive relationship.
A troubled adolescence
Clark admitted that her Philippines-born mum was very strict and religious and that the rigidity at home pushed her to “crave freedom”.
“It was hard for me to watch all my friends go out, do whatever they wanted to do and their parents didn’t really care whereas I had all these rules because my mum wanted to keep me safe,” she said.
“I would do things mum didn’t want me to do, like getting a boyfriend. She didn’t want me to lose my virginity before I was married and there was just no education around that.
But then, I started dating someone and I went through the hardest time of my life. I found out I was pregnant.
Kat Clark
Within six weeks of giving birth to her daughter Latisha, Clark left her mum’s house in Brisbane and began living with her then-partner in Cairns.
After the first few months of peace, she shared that things began to shift.
[Trigger warning: The following account may be disturbing to some.]
My partner became quite abusive. He controlled my money. He wouldn’t allow me to have a phone. He was drinking every weekend.
Kat Clark
“I was so young and I had a newborn. I didn’t know who I was. My self-confidence was shattered.
“I didn’t know anyone where we lived. I left all my friends and family back home. There was no one I could turn to for advice.”
‘Her cry was different this time’
Clark shared that there were a lot of times when she wanted to leave, but what she said held her back was the thought that no one would ever love her and that she would struggle as a single mum for the rest of her her life.
However, she said that one night pushed those thoughts away, allowing her to finally follow through on her decision to leave.
“He went out one night and I had put Latisha in another room because were fighting,” she said.
“He (later) held me by my throat against the wall. It was then that Latisha crawled into the room.
“She started screaming and crying. It was a terrified cry that I had never heard from her before. It was something I never wanted my child to go through.”
From that night, Clark said that she would steal $2 from her partner’s wallet every week and hide the cash in between her daughter’s clothes.
“When I got to $50, I went down to Telstra and purchased a prepaid phone. It was cheaper then,” she said.
Kat Clark as an 18-year old single mum Credit: Kat Clark
“I started contacting my friends back home and told them everything that was happening to me. After about a month and a half, I gathered up the courage to book a trip back to my mum’s place.
“I told my partner that I wanted to bring Latisha home so that we could spend Christmas with my family. I told him he should go back to his family as well.”
The night before she left, she said that her partner took her IDs, passports, and all of Latisha’s baby photos so that she would be forced to return.
“I told him I would come back,” she said.
“My anxiety was so bad that I couldn’t even get on a plane, so I decided to take a train even if it took 24 hours.
“He dropped me off at the station and gave me a prepaid phone. He told me I had to answer his calls or else he would come for me.
“After a five-minute break at the station, I sent him a text message that I was never coming back. I threw the phone in the bin and got on the train. That was the last time I ever heard from him.”
TikTok’s ‘healthy recipe’ girl
After returning to Brisbane, Clark met her now-husband, had another daughter, Deja, and, eventually worked her way up at a market research company.
“Life was going well and I remember walking into the office one day and thinking how far I had come, but also how unhappy I was. I was pretending to be this professional girl and pretending to be someone I wasn’t,” she said.
It was at this point that Clark said she began building an online business and going to the gym to improve her physical and mental well-being.
“One day, I saw a sign at the gym cafe that they needed someone to take over. (The) Rent was cheap, so I quit my job to be a full-time cafe owner,” she said.
“One afternoon, I started recording my healthy recipes and my kids told me to put them on TikTok. No one knew me on there, so I just decided to see what would happen.
“I would post recipes every day and they just blew up. People loved them! It came at a time that I actually had to let go of the cafe and I had a community of women online that I was supporting when it came to improving their health.”
Clark shared that she was popularly known as the “healthy recipe girl”, but admitted her reach grew when she shared her personal story.
When I opened up about my story, that’s when people were like, ‘I had no idea!’
Kat Clark
“I shared my story because my main goal is to be able to uplift women in similar situations,” she said.
“We are launching a business wherein a percentage of our profits will go to an organisation that supports women affected by domestic violence.”
Her success as a social media influencer has now expanded to ‘Basically Besties’, a successful podcast that she runs with Latisha.
‘I’m a mum above all else’
Clark has 5.8 million followers and 382.1 million likes on TikTok but said that along with the success, she had had her share of haters and trolls.
“It’s definitely a tricky thing to navigate because I have never witnessed this much hate before in my life; but obviously, when you grow an audience, there are going to be people that dislike you,” she said.
“If people are hating me, it’s kind of easy to just laugh it off; but when they’re attacking my children, it’s hard for me to hold back and (not) fight.
“It’s those comments that get to me – anything about the race or skin colour of my kids. It’s hard to bite my tongue and ignore the haters.”
Clark admitted that her parenting style was another issue she was criticised for online, with some people thinking that she had no rules set for her children.
There are rules set in our home. There’s a time for joking around and not joking around.
Kat Clark
She said that the news that her 12-year-old daughter Deja would be home-schooled to be a full-time influencer was untrue.
“She’s being home-schooled for many different reasons, such as we have been travelling a lot and she missed out on so much school. There have also been issues of bullying in school,” Clark said.
“Home-schooling is going to allow us to be more in control of her education. My husband actually quit his job so that he could home-school her full-time.
“Things might change in a year or so and we’re open to see what works best for her.”
At the end of the day, Clark said that the happiness and safety of her daughters were all that mattered.
At the end of the day, Clark says that the happiness and safety of her daughters, Latisha and Deja, are all that matters. Credit: Kat Clark
“I’ve always wanted to be the kind of mother that my girls could come to for anything – even if it wouldn’t make me happy, even if it would make me upset,” Clark said.
“I just want my children to be happy and healthy. I want them to be kind human beings. That’s my main priority and purpose as a mother.”
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic or family violence you can call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732 or, get in touch with them through their
.
>>> Read full article>>>
Copyright for syndicated content belongs to the linked Source : SBS – https://www.sbs.com.au/language/filipino/en/article/kat-clark-is-more-than-just-tiktok-creator-of-the-year-for-2022-shes-a-mum-and-a-survivor/9r38ug1xg