Gareth Southgate has done it again – This is laughable

You have to hand it to Gareth Southgate.

He has got this outstanding ability.

Reinforced by watching England 1 Denmark 1 on Thursday night.

That ability to turn players who look like world beaters for their clubs, into absolute donkeys.

Nothing wrong with the effort of these England donkeys against Denmark, it is crystal clear though that they have zero faith in Gareth Southgate and think he’s a joke.

As usual, Southgate laid out his team so negatively, midfielders so deep and acting as basically extra defenders. Then even when England fluked a lead thanks to Walker’s excellent individual opportunism when pressing high (now that’s an idea…) and Kane tapping into an open goal, Gareth Southgate still refused to allow his team to attack.

The likes of Bellingham, Rice, Saka and Foden all totally stifled by the ultra-negative tactics, Gareth Southgate ordering them to stay back, stay deep, invite Denmark to take the initiative and sure enough inviting them to score the equaliser you could see coming a mile off.

The truth is, we all knew what was on the cards for sure, over an hour before the match even kicked off…

England team v Denmark:

Pickford, Trippier, Guehi, Stones, Walker, Rice, Alexander-Arnold, Foden, Bellingham, Saka, Kane

Once again, you can read Gareth Southgate like a very bad book. I have no doubt that in his head he will have been telling himself, England had a great win against Serbia so more of the same please.

The reality is that against Serbia, England started quite brightly, scored a good goal when Walker and Saka combined well down the right and the cross took a fortunate deflection to fall perfectly for Belligham to head home. However… Gareth Southgate then tried to defend a one goal lead from that point and only huge luck meant that ended in a win. The England goal leading a charmed life and thankfully Serbia not good enough to take advantage. Trent Alexander-Arnold was woeful in midfield and helped disrupt so much of the team with the likes of Foden playing out of position, whilst Kane was terrible, so slow and unwilling to even press the Serbian defenders. Whilst the refusal to play an attacking player who would stay wide left and stretch the play (such as a certain scouser who used to play for Everton…) massively impacted the attacking threat.

So what does Gareth Southgate do against Denmark? That’s right, same again!

So defensive the tactics, Trent Alexander-Arnold woeful in midfield, players such as Foden and others stifled, by both the horrific tactics and the selection of the Liverpool player in midfield. Kane shocking and so immobile, the England goal leading a charmed life, zero threat down the left due to the refusal to play somebody willing to stay wide left and stretch the play…

Never mind Groundhog Day, this is Gormless Day, Gareth Southgate on repeat and repeat.

As usual, Gareth Southgate talking absolute nonsense afterwards. Never easy in tournaments/international football, still got four points from two games, unbeaten, we move on… but that is the problem isn’t it, we don’t move on!

England Team Photo Euro 2024 Denmark

Having watched almost all of these matches at the European Championships so far, England have looked by some distance one of the worst teams. Whilst others are playing wonderful expansive exciting football, it is a massive effort to sit through and persevere watching England matches to the very end.

Most neutrals would probably select pretty much the entire England eleven last night, if asked to match them up against their Danish counterparts. Yet Gareth Southgate manages to make these players who excel for their clubs, look like it was the equivalent of Man City v Sheffield United last night and England were NOT Man City.

Watkins was an obvious and belated sub and predictably just by running around a bit looked far better than Kane. Thankfully Alexander-Arnold was eventually dragged off but Gallagher isn’t exactly inspiring. Whilst I am totally baffled that Bowen and Eze come on ahead of Palmer and Gordon???

I thought Kieran Trippier had a very good game at left-back and it isn’t his fault there is no attacking threat on the left, it is Southgate’s refusal to play a left winger who will run at the opposition.

Actually Pickford and his defence all did ok and saved England (thanks to luck massively as well) from a defeat that would have been deserved.

We now move on to Tuesday and Slovenia, surely Gareth Southgate can’t go same again… or can he?

Newcastle United players on international duty:

Saturday 15 June

Switzerland 3 Hungary 1 (Euros Group match)

The Newcastle United defender with a very good personal performance, playing the full 90 minutes as the Swiss deservedly beat Hungary.

Sunday 16 June

England 1 Serbia 0 (Euros Group match)

England got the job done, eventually.

Anthony Gordon an unused substitute but Kieran Trippier playing the full 90 minutes and doing ok at left-back. His job to stretch things in attack up England’s left hand side, with likes of Foden not willing/able to stay out wide and instead continually drifting inside. With the plan clearly for all of England’s main attacking to be through the middle and especially out wide on the right.

That is where the excellent winning goal came from, a great ball from Walker putting Saka in behind and his deflected cross perfectly then flighted for Bellingham’s pinpoint run into the box and the header giving Serbia’s keeper no chance.

At the other end was Trippier’s main task though and with the rest of the defence he did well, especially after the break when England suddenly went all defensive and invited Serbia to go for the equaliser. The Three Lions offering zero threat in the second-half apart from sub Bowen’s cross where the keeper made a great save but in reality Kane should have given him zero chance with the header.

Pickford only had one shot on target to save all game and whilst the commentator and pundits raved about it, in reality it was from outside the box and straight at him, the England keeper tipping the ball over the bar.

The highlight of Trippier’s performance was when Serbia got into the box on the left and an equaliser beckoned for Serbia with Mitrovic waiting for the ball to be squared for a tap-in. However, the Newcastle defender covering his central defenders had got across and was too strong for Mitro who was sent sprawling  and claiming for a forlorn penalty.

Monday 17 June

Slovakia 1 Belgium 0 (Euros Group match)

Martin Dubravka and his Slovakia teammates pulling off a massive shock, third ranked in the world Belgium beaten by a team ranked 48th.

Schranz scoring after only seven minutes and the Newcastle keeper and his international teammates more than matching Belgium. What a victory.

Wednesday 19 June

Switzerland 1 Scotland 1 (Euros Group match)

Fabian Schar and Switzerland with a nightmare start after 13 minutes, the Newcastle defender deflecting a McTominay shot past his keeper, a shot which would almost for sure have been saved without Schar’s intervention.

The NUFC defender recovering to have another decent game. Helping Switzerland stand up to a very physical but limited Scotland team, Shaqiri with a brilliant 26th minute long range curled into the top corner effort to equalise. The Swiss should have went on to win but wasted a fair few chances and Scotland got lucky with two goals denied by VAR fine margins.

Thursday 20 June 2024

England 1 Denmark 1 (Euros Group match)

Yet another Gareth Southgate masterclass of cluelessness and negativity.

The team playing so deep and defensive, clearly the plan to try and stop Denmark scoring and not a plan of how England would score.

On 18 minutes some individual opportunism and ambition by Kyle Walker as he ignored Southgate’s orders and pressed high, won the ball in a dangerous position and Kane scoring from close in, he couldn’t miss.

Southgate’s reaction was to have England even more negative and defensive, invited Denmark on and they equalised 16 minites later. The whole game a shambles with the negative tactics and no apparent plan as to how England were trying to win the game. Very lucky to get a draw.

Kieran Trippier played well on the left and didn’t put a foot wrong.

Friday 21 June 2024

Slovakia v Ukraine (Martin Dubravka) Euros Group match 2pm BBC1

Sunday 23 June 2024

Switzerland v Germany (Fabian Schar) Euros Group match 8pm BBC TBC

Monday 24 June 2024

Costa Rica v Brazil (Bruno Guimaraes) Copa America Group match

Colombia v Paraguay (Miguel Almiron) Copa America Group match

Tuesday 25 June 2024

England v Slovenia (Anthony Gordon and Kieran Trippier) Euros Group match 8pm ITV1

Wednesday 26 June 2024

Slovakia v Romania (Martin Dubraka) Euros Group match 5pm BBC2

Friday 28 June 2024

Paraguay v Brazil (Bruno Guimaraes and Miguel Almiron) Copa America Group match

Tuesday 2 July 2024

Colombia v Brazil (Bruno Guimaraes) Copa America Group match

(There will of course be more matches for Newcastle United players if their nations get through the group stages of the Copa America and/or the European Championships.)

Sunday 14 July 2024 – European Championships final.

Sunday 14 July 2024 – Copa America final.

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